If you are going through a tough time, as if life just sucker-punched you, this narrative is for you. I sincerely hope that my words lend comfort and encouragement as you ride out your storm. One of the greatest lessons adversity has taught me is how others feel when tragedy hits. My experience with hardship and obstacles has made me more compassionate for others who are going through their difficulty, which is the reason for me penning this narrative.
While nobody gets an immunity card that lets us skate through life unharmed, how we deal with setbacks can make or break us. I find it remarkably interesting, as I learn from those who deal with obstacles properly (winners), compared to others who repeatedly handle the adversity by singing the “woe is me” song (losers). Many winners believe that trials and sufferings have a purpose and that during their troubles, they have the faith that something bigger and better is on the other side!
I suggest that our misfortunes are one of the most effective tools of strengthening our faith and character. Isn’t part of the excitement of overcoming our hardships looking back at all the obstacles that we overcame and the pain we endured? Don’t our struggles make the victory that much more satisfying and rewarding? Hard times are a beautiful thing, and we should carry our black and blues proudly. Regrettably, it took me far too long to realize that difficulties are a valuable part of life, and through my pain and suffering, I would develop the mental capacity to endure life’s toughest battles.
The primary reason why most people have difficulty climbing out of the abyss is that “enemy” likes to plant his cancer of doubt. Billy Alsbrook, one of my favorite Christian motivational speakers, maybe said it best: “The enemy will attempt to inject us with a deadly disease called doubt. This contagious cancer is a dream killer set on murdering your future. We must destroy, annihilate and uproot all traces of it from our life.”
When the messenger of misery pays me his seemingly regular visits, I immediately think, “Destroy the enemy within,” which empowers me to whisper (sometimes scream) the following, “Hello enemy, allow me to introduce myself. I am Harry, the warrior, the champion. You have no control over me, as I know that greatness is on the other side of this pain. I will never tap out to pain. Instead, I will embrace it, as pain is my friend! I will feed the beast and starve the doubt!”
Perhaps your current storm is due to someone doing you wrong. If so, is your instant reaction resentment, anger, instead of forgiveness? If it is the former, then rest assured that the enemy is joyful, as you are in his world doing exactly as he desires! When we truly wrap our mind around this notion, changing our behavior to a winner’s mentality should be effortless.
According to Mr. Alsbrook, “Not forgiving, is akin to emotional incarceration, spiritual self-imprisonment that is behind invisible bars and we are the only one that can provide the release date!” Maybe Confucius was spot on when he said, “To be wronged is nothing, unless you continue to remember it.”
The sage’s statement reminds me of what I read some time ago: Holding onto resentment is like taking rat poison and waiting for the rat to die! Oh my, did I repeatedly devour rate poison?! As a recovering grudge holder, I would not rest until I was sure someone else felt as badly as he or she made me feel. I would cling to bitterness until it made me physically sick all the while believing in my asinine methodology!
When doom and gloom enter our lives, I suggest that we focus on another simple task: progress. I don’t care if it is our diet, our faith, our relationships, our finances, our health or our job, let’s make daily progress to become better and then watch the magic appear in the form of improved mood, outlook on life and happiness. Allow me to close this heartfelt message with a fact that only Rocky Balboa could so eloquently convey:
“The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place. And I don’t care how tough you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you there if you let it. You, me or nobody is going to hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard you can hit, it’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward … That’s how winning is done. Now, if you know what you’re worth, then go out and get what you’re worth. But you gotta be willing to take the hit, and not pointing fingers saying you ain’t where you are because of him, or her, or anybody. Cowards do that and that ain’t you. You’re better than that!”
Yes indeed, Rocky! It’s about how hard we can get hit and keep moving forward! Adversity is never a time to give in, but a time to dig in! Keep advancing, my friends!
Harry Pappas Jr. CFP®
Managing Director-Investments
Master of Science Degree Personal Financial Planning
Certified Estate & Trust Specialist ™
Certified Divorce Financial Analyst™
Pappas Wealth Management Group of Wells Fargo Advisors
818 North Highway A1A, Ste 200
Ponte Vedra, Florida 32082
904-273-7955
harry.pappas@wellsfargoadvisors.com
The use of the CDFA™ designation does not permit Wells Fargo Advisors or its Financial Advisors to provide legal advice, nor is it meant to imply that the firm or its associates are acting as experts in this field.
Wells Fargo Advisors is a trade name used by Wells Fargo Clearing Services, LLC, Member SIPC, a Registered Broker-Dealer and a non-bank affiliate of Wells Fargo & Company.
The opinions expressed in this report are those of the author(s) and are subject to change. The material has been prepared or is distributed solely for information purposes and is not a solicitation or an offer to buy any security or instrument or to participate in any trading strategy.
