For kids — and even some adults — a birthday is the most important day of the year.
Once a year your son or daughter gets an excuse to be the absolute, unapologetic center of attention for a day.
A memorable birthday party is something your child might remember fondly well into their adulthood. I, for example, will never forget the year when my parents actually produced a pony — if only for a day — and I had the absolute coolest, most talked about birthday party ever.
Parties need not be expensive (or involve ponies) in order to have a result like this, however. Another birthday I remember fondly was one where the original plan was rained out. My guests and I went to the movie theater instead. It was no pony ride, but we loved it all the same.
Since this monumental occasion, your child’s birthday, comes but once a year, there may be some performance anxiety involved in planning his or her birthday. But worrying is not a necessity when it comes to birthday parties.
Planning, on the other hand, is.
Take time before your child’s birthday to make some simple plans (and contingency plans) and you’ll save yourself unnecessary headaches when the big day does arrive.
After all, a birthday party should be something you enjoy as a parent as well.
Before you know it, you’ll be planning graduation parties, engagement parties and weddings! So plan ahead so you can savor that special day, too.
Make a timeline
If this is a particularly significant birthday or if it’s the first birthday party you’ve planned in a while, you could probably benefit from making a party planning timeline. This is unnecessary for small parties, but can help if you are inviting an entire class or planning a big bash.
Events on the timeline should include choosing a date and venue or entertainer, sending out invitations, arranging for child care or pet care, ordering a cake and decorating your home or venue.
A more detailed timeline is ambitious but can help you stay on track. Setting goals will ensure you don’t let important dates slip by because of the normal busy activities of the week.
Decide on a date
A date for your party can be decided by when your rentals are available, when a venue is open, when an entertainer has a free spot or when you and your family have a free weekend. The earlier you decide, the better.
Although weekend afternoons are the most popular time for birthday parties, consider a weekday party just after school or a weekend morning party. After all, weekend afternoons are taken up for many families with travel, sports events, practices and other activities.
If you decide to book your party during this busy time, consider sending out invitations as early as possible to ensure that all of your child’s friends can attend.
Renting a venue or bounce house can be more expensive at this time, too — so consider the money you may be able to save by booking a less popular time.
If you’re planning on hiring an entertainer and you have someone specific in mind, contact them as soon as possible.
Who to invite
As children get older and social circles expand, this can be a tough question. You don’t want to leave anyone out in the class, but you might not have the resources or desire to entertain 20 children at once.
One popular solution is to invite as many children as your child is years old. For example, if your child is turning 9, you would invite 9 guests. This keeps party sizes manageable and gives rationale for how many children you invite.
If you can only invite a certain number of children, make sure your invitations are discreet. If your child has a class of 18 and only 9 are coming, mail invitations to children’s homes rather than having your child hand them out in class.
Consider your plans and venue as well when deciding how many children to invite. If you plan on having the party in your back yard, you might be able to handle more children than at an indoor party.
Don’t feel pressured to invite the whole class or attendees’ siblings. After all, the party is about the birthday boy or girl!
Another way to limit party size is to make the party gender specific.
About invitations
Your invitations should include a specific party location with address and phone number. Parents might want to call a venue for specific directions or with questions.
You can help fellow parents out by letting them know, generally, how their child should dress and what they should bring. Tennis shoes or flip-flops, for example. Should they bring a swimsuit and a towel? Sunscreen?
Also let parents know what food, if any, will be served. Will there be a full lunch served or just cake and treats?
Finally, make sure there is information about how and when to RSVP. Give yourself enough time to plan according to RSVPs — at least one week.
Collecting RSVPs
Be prepared to answer questions when parents call to RSVP and ask what the birthday boy or girl wants as a gift. General answers about their interests are fine. Jill loves soccer, art supplies and chapter books. Matt is really into dinosaurs this year.
General guidelines are much more helpful than saying, “Oh, anything is fine!”
When parents call to RSVP, make sure to ask if their child has any special needs, allergies or food allergies. If a child does have an allergy, make sure any emergency supplies needed to deal with the allergy are on hand for the party, such as an epi pen sent by the parent.
What if someone doesn’t RSVP? Don’t be afraid to call parents. The party may have slipped between the cracks that week or the invitation gotten lost in a stack of mail. Most parents will appreciate that you’re reaching out.
Prepping for the big day
The devil’s in the details. Make a checklist as things occur to you.
If you’re having a home party and you have pets, you’ll want to figure out the best place for the pets during the party. Even small dogs and cats should have their own secure spot during the party — for their safety as well as your guests’.
Dogs and cats can be comfortably closed into a room during a party with food, water and someone to check on them. If a dog can’t be left alone without barking, consider doing yourself and the pet a favor by booking dog boarding for the day of the party.
If your birthday boy or girl has younger siblings or siblings close to his or her age, consider arranging an alternate activity for them. Whether it’s a trip to grandma’s or a play date elsewhere, keeping siblings occupied can prevent jealousy and other headaches.
If your party is outside, make a backup plan for inclement weather. You can include this information in the invitations.
Get your recording devices ready. Download and delete old pictures and videos from your camera cards and make sure all of your batteries are charged and ready to go.
Birthdays as a learning opportunity
Although it might not be your very first thought in planning, remember that a birthday party should be a learning opportunity for your child.
You can talk to him or her about proper behavior, depending on age. Even young children should know they should greet every guest and say goodbye as people leave. Young children can also understand the concept of saying thank you for presents — even ones they don’t necessarily love. It’s never too early to teach gratitude and help your child put it into action.
As your child gets older, consider talking to him or her about making all of the party guests feel included. The birthday boy or girl shouldn’t spend the whole party talking to just one or two of their best friends — they should spend some time with everyone who attends.
The older your child is, the more he or she can be involved in the planning of the party. Getting them involved might make them feel less like a diva on the day of the event, and they will be more inclined to make sure that all of the guests are having a good time.
kelly@opcfla.com
(904) 686-3943
